Business Intelligence Lowdown

101 Bonehead Mistakes Every Manager Should Avoid

We’ve all heard that “To err is human, to forgive divine,” but how many of us realize the truth behind that old adage? We tend to make more than our share of mistakes, and most of our compatriots show that they are 100 percent human and zero percent divine by never letting us forget our trespasses. And in case you’re a manager or superior of some kind, the divinity aspect goes flying out the window. There are eyes watching you from all directions, waiting to see if you’ll trip up, either over your own feet or over those extended by others.

Being the perfect manager is akin to walking on a minefield, you have to watch your every step carefully or you risk being blown off your pedestal and/or losing the respect of your subordinates. The rules to succeed are simple, mostly a concoction of a large amount of common sense and a smaller dose of shrewdness and people sense. But what with common sense being not all that common, we’ve prepared a list of mistakes that we think should feature high on any manager’s avoidance list. And without further ado, here they are:

Negate the negatives…

DON’T:

1. Think you know everything there is to know. The learning process never ends, no matter how high you’ve climbed up the corporate ladder.
2. Hesitate to admit your faults and mistakes. Nobody’s perfect, we can only try to bring down the number and learn from them.
3. Try to prove you’re the boss. “Do this because I said so” will neither cut the ice nor win you brownie points with your employees.
4. Think that just because you’re the manager, you’re smarter than all your employees.
5. Be rude. Being a superior just does not give you that right.
6. Shirk responsibility or transfer it to your employees just because they are not in a position to refuse you.
7. Be afraid to do anything. Have enough confidence in yourself to know you are capable of the work entrusted to you.
8. Abuse your employees. Taking them to task is one thing, shouting obscenities for a work-related offense is entirely another.
9. Overburden them with work. They may do it, but once the quantity goes up, the quality of work starts suffering. 
10. Keep changing the way things are done. Some managers equate change to progress, and so, make changes, for the sake of change alone.
11. Take the blame when your subordinates make mistakes. It’s a magnanimous gesture on your part I’m sure, but then, they need to learn to accept responsibility for their own actions.
12. Deny your employees the opportunity for further training. It will make a huge difference to the way they do their jobs.
13. Fail to recognize/appreciate/reward work well done and tasks completed ahead of schedule.
14. Hesitate to ask for help when you need it, either from your peers or your subordinates. A little humility and signs of humanness go a long way.
15. Use business jargon and buzzwords that only tend to confuse and go above your employees’ heads. Some managers resort to bombastic language to cover the fact that they do not know what they are talking about. Speak in plain English (or in your native tongue) so that you are understood without any ambiguity.
16. Be inconsistent. Saying one thing one day and singing a different tune the next will not endear you to either your colleagues or your superiors.
17. Undertake any endeavor without sufficient planning. With even the best-laid plans going awry at times, the importance of planning for all situations cannot be emphasized enough.
18. Make hasty decisions. On-the-spur choices without considering the pros and cons often lead to disastrous consequences.
19. Deny your employees the basic (and not-so-basic) tools and gadgets needed to do their work efficiently. IT department heads are notorious for asking their employees to “get by” with the software they have presently, deeming an upgrade unnecessary.
20. Think you have to keep doing something all the time. You have to actually be productive, not just run around trying to look busy, while actually doing nothing useful.
21. Lose focus of corporate goals and objectives in all your activities.
22. Neglect long-term plans for growth in the course of dealing with short-term day-to-day tasks and problems. A company thrives on growth, not stagnancy.
23. Miss out on opportunities. There’s a truth to the saying that opportunity knocks but once, and if you’re not ready, it goes through the open doors of your competitor. Grab half-chances too and try and work things out to your company’s advantage.
24. Remain detached from the proceedings and activities around you. You may not be involved in all the tasks going on, but try and keep an eye on and be aware of what’s going on around you.
25. Fire your employees through a phone call, email, or worse, text message. Give them the bad news face-to-face.
26. Hide from them the reason for their dismissal.
27. Sugarcoat the explanation for having to let them go. You don’t have to be harsh or rude, just break the news to them gently while telling them the truth.
28. Neglect to follow up on delegated tasks. You are after all, responsible for seeing that they get done.
29. Try to change personalities and personal habits of your employees.
30. Snoop around your employees’ desks and personal paraphernalia.
31. Pry into their private affairs. An occasional interest in the family is alright without probing too deeply into personal stuff.
32. Try to be liked by all your employees. You’ll only end up pleasing nobody if you try to please everybody.
33. Play amateur psychotherapist. Your employees need you to be just their manager.
34. Live in the past. Our world is changing at a rapid pace, and to move with the times and get ahead, you have to embrace innovations and newness and adapt to it.
35. Keep apologizing for your actions. You need to preserve that air of authority about you.
36. Speak disrespectfully about your superiors or peers to your employees. be the optimist all the time
37. Forget that to motivate your people, you must first gain their respect and support.
38. Promise your employees perks you know you will not be able to deliver.
39. Take credit for your employees’ work. Give credit where it’s due, otherwise, you end up taking away their motivation to work and losing the respect they have for you.
40. Withhold payment from your employees as a means of punishment for some misdemeanor.
41. Gossip about your peers or subordinates. It does not set a good example for your employees to follow.
42. Assign staff members who cannot tolerate each other or who do not get along well to the same team. You’re only hindering progress.
43. Be critical without being constructive. If you chide your employees regarding a particular task, tell them not only what’s wrong, but also what has to be done to do things the right way.
44. Give orders. Requests yield better results. 
45. Be too polite or let your employees pull the wool over your eyes. Some employees may take advantage of and walk all over you. Don’t earn a reputation as a soft touch.
46. Try to control the method your employees use to carry out their tasks.
47. Be swayed by flattery.
48. Encourage employees who rat on their counterparts.
49. Pit your employees against each other. They need to be able to function well as a team to enhance your department’s productivity.
50. Try to be your employees’ best buddy. It’s an awkward situation when you try to bond too much with them on a personal level. Taking them to task and ensuring that they don’t overstep their limits becomes a problem.
51. Be too negative. An optimistic attitude rubs off on your employees as well.
52. Be too positive. Sometimes, pretending that everything will work out well no matter what has an adverse effect on your employees. They may need a small amount of stress and uncertainty to produce their best.
53. Lose focus of your customers. They are the mainstay of your business.
54. Recognize only your top, over-achieving performers. Others deserve appreciation too, if you feel they are putting in their best, even though they do not achieve spectacular success.
55. Neglect to provide continuous feedback about their work. Waiting for an annual/biannual performance appraisal may not allow them to hone their skills and work on their negative aspects.
56. Avoid risks. Take calculated ones and know how to manage them.
57. Make fun of one employee ganging with a few others.
58. Discriminate against your employees on any basis, be it racial, cultural or personal.
59. Look down on people from other countries, especially if their accents, customs and clothes are not the same as yours.
60. Remain detached when a bunch of office bullies gang up on one person.
61. Assign jobs to people least-suited to them.
62. Base appraisal decisions on very recent performances. Take their overall service to the organization into account.
63. Vent your ire on your staff when they’re having a bad day without knowing the reason behind the poor performance. They may be going through a rough time personally – a relationship may have come to an end, a loved one may have passed away – cut them some slack before you take them to task.
64. Insist on your employees being jacks-of-all-trades.
65. Assume that things are going well. Keep constant tabs on the status of all the tasks and projects going on under your management. 
66. Remain aloof from bad news, especially when you have to break it to a subordinate.
67. Suck up to your employees when you’re short-staffed or be arrogant with them when you don’t really care if they quit or not.
68. Disturb them at home/ during vacations/off hours with trivialities.
69. Drop in unannounced at their residences and assign them work with the tag “To be completed by tomorrow morning.”
70. Accept gifts or favors from your employees.
71. Get your secretary to run your personal errands.
72. Sexually harass employees of the opposite (or same) sex.
73. Indulge in casual office affairs. They become real messy when they end, especially if they do so on unfriendly terms.
74. Have impromptu (or planned) sex on your office table.

Enhance the positives…

DO:

75. Plan for contingencies. Do not expect everything to remain picture-perfect all the time. Have effective and tested back-up plans in place.
76. Plan your work-day so that you are not left wondering where the hours have flown when it’s time to go home. 
77. Set priorities. Do the things that are critical first instead of those that are not.
78. Delegate. Taking too much on your shoulders is the shortest route to disaster and confusion.
79. Take your employees into confidence in all issues that relate to them or the work they do. You’ll find that people work better when they have a sense of understanding and purpose to the job at hand.
80. Give your employees room to grow, both personally and professionally.
81. Practice what you preach. Don’t say one thing and do the exact opposite. If you expect your employees to be punctual, you have to make an effort to watch the clock too.
82. Invest time and effort in your people. You cannot run the show on your own. Nurture them, motivate them, and coax their best work out of them.
83. Document important aspects of your work. A good filing and document-management system is an asset to every good manager.
84. Listen when your employees speak. Don’t dismiss their ideas even before you’ve heard them.
85. Know how to effectively manage your teams.
86. Be ethical in all your dealings.
87. Set standards for your employees to follow. You are their leader; what you do sets the precedent for them to follow.
88. Treat your employees equally without playing favorites. 
89. Focus more on the strengths of your employees, not their weaknesses. The more you get them to improve their strengths, the more their weaknesses fade into the background.
90. Utilize the individual strengths of your employees in forming your teams so that each team is balanced.
91. Make eye contact when speaking on a one-to-one level, especially when you’re handing out bad news.
92. Ask questions. Some employees, though loaded in talent and ability, are too shy to come out of their shells and ask when they need something or speak out when they face problems.
93. Know how to interview potential candidates so that you hire the best for your company.
94. Know approximate time estimates for each task. This allows you to set reasonable deadlines for your staff to meet.
95. Take a personal interest in the welfare of your employees. Remember to ask occasionally about their families or interests outside work.
96. Turn a blind eye at times to goings-on that are inconsequential to the work at hand. Ignorance is bliss sometimes.
97. Hone your communication skills so that you are able to handle all your interactions, with your superiors, peers, customers and subordinates, with ease. It does not pay to say the wrong things at the wrong times.
98. Set communication protocols – delineate the situations that require emails, phone calls or actual letters.
99. Encourage your employees’ creativity and applaud them when they come up with innovative ways to get tasks done.
100. Deal patiently and kindly with families of employees in times of emergencies.
101. Trust your employees to be able to work on their own without constantly supervising them.

Doing Business in India: 20 Cultural Norms You Need to Know

When doing business with Indians, Westerners sometimes have a hard time understanding their customs. This can lead to miscommunication and misunderstandings. However, growth can flourish if an effort is made to understand Indians' ethnic values. It pays to follow the adage: “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” Read on for a primer on the formal and informal customs and conventions of India today.

1. A perspective on time: Indians are not particularly renowned for their punctuality; they are perceived as laid back people who only watch the clock when it’s close to quitting time. While that may be true for a small percentage of the population, such as government servants, the vast majority follow a different strategy. For most of the world, time is precious; for the Indian, it’s auspicious. One look at the Indian calendar should give you a clue–it’s never complete without the list of auspicious and inauspicious times and dates. Be it weddings, christenings, new ventures, C-section births, or just stepping out of the house for the first day on a new job–the average Indian allows auspicious times to dictate his activities. Don't dismiss this belief as superstitious nonsense. Remember that the West has its own superstitions: Friday the 13th, black cats and stepping on sidewalk cracks.

2. Addressing issues of respect: When compared to the numerous vernacular languages spoken in India, English is much less polite. Indian languages, unlike English, differentiate between peers and those who are older and command respect. That's why the average Indian tends to address people as “Sir” or “Ma’am,” or affix the title “Mr.” “Ms.” or “Mrs.” before their names: they don’t want to come across as disrespectful. English, on the other hand, is more informal: Americans generally prefer the use of first names. Remember that while most younger Indians will welcome the informality of first names, older ones may consider it an affront, especially if the speaker is much younger.

3. Comfort zone: A casual hug, peck on the cheek, or an arm thrown around a shoulder may not seem out of place in the West. However, in India, even shaking hands with a member of the opposite sex is only in the process of being accepted. The exception to this rule is a handful of metropolitan cities. With the younger crowd drifting to the cities in search of jobs with multinational IT companies and call centers, they’re adapting fast to the casual touch. However, their mates and spouses are often uncomfortable with this personal contact. Be mindful that your idea of touch may be too close for Eastern comfort.

4. Strikes–even when the iron’s not hot: There are times in India when all activity comes to a screeching halt: shops down shutters, people remain closeted in their houses, public transport is shut down, and private conveyances are stoned or pelted if they dare make an appearance. This strange phenomenon, termed a “bandh,” is a source of bewilderment for the foreign business houses in the country. They’re not sure if they should declare a holiday: if they do, their offshore work suffers, clients back home are furious, and precious time and money go down the drain; if they don’t, they risk being the target of angry, irrational mobs. With political clout usually behind these bandhs, it's best to go with the flow.

5. The creaky wheels of bureaucracy: One of the downsides of the great Indian adventure is the political parties that wield a huge amount of power. Industrial ventures are not easy to set up. At times, you'll need to grease their palms. And just when you think you’ve won them over with your powers of persuasion and financial might, the next election rolls around and another party is lodged in the seat of power. No matter what progress you’ve made with their predecessor, it’s back to square one for you. It's extremely frustrating, but that’s the lay of the land.

6. Festivals: The flavor of sub-continental life: India has its fair share of religions, each of them with festivals. A few are short and sweet, but the rest are long, drawn-out affairs. Reasons for celebration range from the long ago slaying of mythical demons to the bountiful harvest that is reaped in the present. National holidays are declared for a few festivals that are celebrated by the majority, but there are others that often go unobserved. Overseas companies should anticipate and accept employees asking for vacation time around these days. It will be more appreciated at this time than around Western-centric Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year.

7. Marriages are made in India: An Indian wedding, especially one that goes on for days, is one of those things that you have to see to believe. In India, marriages are occasions for large get-togethers. They include not only the immediate family, but also the extended cousins, aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas and new additions to the family. Keep in mind that it’s not just the groom or bride who’ll be asking for time off: even a distant third cousin will deem it imperative that he or she attend and enjoy this three or four-day affair.

8. Familial fraternization: The joint family system, prevalent in India for ages, is being nudged out by the nuclear family, a new discovery for the modern Indian. Even so, there are many who still have aged parents and infirm relatives living with them. A good Indian son’s duties include taking care of the elderly in the family. Understandably, a broken bone or heart attack will require the son's, and often daughter's, attention. Employers must be compassionate during these times of family crisis.

9. Sometimes the office is taken home: Invitations to the home for business discussions are not uncommon. Don’t be anxious if you’re asked to lunch or dinner. Indians are very hospitable; the woman of the house will go to great lengths to prepare something she knows you'll enjoy. On your part, you’ll earn brownie points if you treat your host’s family with courtesy and respect. A small gift is greatly appreciated when you’re visiting a business partner’s home.

10. Small talk is big: If you are hosting the business meetings, remember that Indians are not as direct as their American counterparts. They generally start with small talk and relatively unimportant topics before migrating to the main issue. They also place importance on refreshments during the course of the meeting, either at the beginning, or in the middle during a break, depending on the time of day.

11. Going by the book: While Americans are generally more results-oriented, caring more about the end result than the path taken to get there, Indians are sticklers for policy. They are used to following preset steps to arrive at a solution, usually because they do not want to get into trouble with someone above them in the hierarchy. Most of them are afraid of stepping out of line, but if encouraged to try new methods, they will be happy to do so.

12. Don’t toe the line: The word “queue” has no significant meaning to the average Indian. The country has developed in leaps and bounds, but a few of its citizens still think that leaps and bounds are the way to go when asked to queue up at a public facility. Even the most civilized person can be reduced to fighting for his rightful place when others form a mass of people all jockeying to be first.

13. Call them more than cards: Indians place a lot of importance on business cards, handing them out even for casual occasions. A stranger will offer you his card if you so much as ask him his name while you're traveling on the same train. He's not being pushy: it’s just his way of packing his name, profession, and other details onto just one card.

14. Transport traditions and travails: If you spend some time in India, you may be forced to test its public modes of transportation at some time or another. You’ll find that your fellow passengers will be more than happy to help when you find yourself unfamiliar with the local lingo or have difficulty deciding where to get off. On the other hand, local auto rickshaw and taxi drivers may try to fleece you when they see you’re not a native. Familiarize yourself with the local currency and the approximate transportation costs before you venture out on your own. 

15. Is that English? It’s the same language, but it’s spoken with a distinctly different flavor in each part of the world. Every country adds to the language or takes words from it for its own tongue. In India, the English language is spoken with an Indian accent, although it is not as pronounced as some other countries. You’ll find unusual expressions being used: “cousin brother/sister” (cousin), “co-brother/sister” (brother or sister-in-law), and “What’s your good name?” (What’s your name?). Most Indians are familiar with the Western accent, but it helps to speak slowly. If you don't understand what they've said, don't worry-they don't mind repeating themselves. 

16. Not too good with paperwork: Indians are not very big on documentation; they generally have to be taught to maintain proper records. Official correspondence is usually long-winded with pompous language that the ordinary person does not understand. E-mail has become a replacement for hand-written or printed documents, but there’s a general ignorance of email etiquette. However, once shown the right way, Indians are adept at picking up any new technique.

17. The tower of Babel? India has a potpourri of local languages, with most Indians fluent in more than just their mother tongue. If you come across a group conversing in the local lingo, don’t take it as an affront-they aren't talking secretively about you. It’s just their way of connecting to people who remind them of home.

18. Herd mentality rules: Most Indians are not very confident speaking in public. If you ask a group of Indians to raise pertinent questions during a meeting, you’ll find that all the queries are posed once the meeting has broken up, by a small crowd that draws support from each of its members, and when the speaker is alone.

19. They mind their Ps and Qs, but differently: “Please” and “Thank You” are matter-of-fact for the polite Westerner, but an Indian may not feel the need to mention them. It does not mean that he’s rude or impolite. Indians express their pleasure in a different manner: with a smile or a nod of the head. 

20. Pecking orders matter: Most Indian businesses have an order of hierarchy that’s very important to those in the chain. When communicating with Indians, it pays to address the more important members first.

There’s an Indian adage that says, “It takes two hands to generate applause.” That’s especially true when two cultures meet. Both should be willing to accept the idiosyncrasies of the other and work together to reach a common point of agreement. Keep these tips in mind when working with Indian people.

How to be a Terrible Network Admin: 25 Fail-safe Tips

You walk in to work everyday wishing you didn’t have to; you drag your feet all day long as you’re bombarded with complaints: “I can’t log into the system,” “I can’t access the printer (or drive or server),” “This software just refuses to work the way I want it to.” To top if off, you’re showered with the worst nicknames because you don’t seem to know what you’re doing. You are the terrible network administrator.

Rather than working with your users and engaging in practical IT security measures, the terrible network administrator enjoys doing next to nothing.

Here are the best 25 ways to make your tenure in networking “The Terrible Times,” not just for you, but for your organization and your end-users as well.

1. No priority for priority: Each new day in the TCP/IP world brings a host of new tasks, some trivial, others critical, and still others perceived as critical though they are not. Besides these, you also have items in your backlog folder that need to be addressed at the earliest possible time. So the best way to screw up your schedule (and that of your users) is to “run from pillar to post” attempting to set things right, without assigning priority to the most severe problems first, without tracking the status of all the requests that pour in, and without documenting the time, tools and methods spent on addressing and resolving each issue.

2. Be busy, not productive: The shortest route to this trick: do not automate recurring tasks, and under no circumstances should you find permanent solutions to common problems. You don’t need to know that you can simplify your work with tools – Neo, NetFlow, MRTG, Oak, TCPDUMP, ping – none of these are a regular part of your vocabulary. And you certainly don’t need to take the trouble to customize some of them using a scripting language. And finally, you don’t need to know that you can use the UPS in a major file server to send an automatic email each time there’s a power spike.

3. Say no to knowing your network: Monitoring your servers and your network interface is unnecessary, simply because you have no need to know how much traffic is traveling about your network. Regular observation of your network provides you with knowledge on normal, trouble-free usage, which in turn helps you identify problem spots and potential causes when you’re called to troubleshoot and plan for future growth. This is not necessary for a terrible network administrator.

4. Bye to Backups: Data is the lifeblood of any organization and probably the most valuable part of a network. Bad network administrators do not have reliable backup measures, do not backup data regularly, and do not have effective recovery plans for system data that is lost or corrupted.

5. Knowledge is dangerous: Identifying new security issues before they become problems is possible with a little research, yet incompetent network administrators are not concerned with such things. They don’t care to know when the new upgrade is out, or how to combat the latest forms of intrusion.

6. Take the “I’m Superman” approach: You’re having a lot of trouble dealing with a particular problem, but you are the know-it-all. You don’t need the assistance of any resource or reference, FAQ lists, or README files -- you can do it yourself.

7. Don’t Document: Writing procedures for troubleshooting a major problem is such a boring task. Terrible administrators fail to log hardware and software specifications and details, make notes on the methods they adopted for troubleshooting (both the ones that worked and those that didn’t), and document the potential causes for network problems. Doing so would save the network countless hours of time and trouble, but then they’re incompetent, who cares?

8. People equate to problems: How often have you wished that the human aspect of the job would just disappear? A terrible network administrator just ignores the users. Who wants to take the time and be patient enough to deal with users who do not understand technical jargon? You don’t need to develop different techniques to deal with individual needs and preferences, nor do you need to understand the procedures and politics that pertain to dealing with human beings. For the incompetent administrator, knowing your network inside out is enough!

9. Get lost in translation: There’s no need for you to listen to (let alone understand) user needs and applications thoroughly before you map them to the right hardware configurations. Network system planning and design are not the concerns of a terrible administrator.

10. Automation is not automatic: A terrible network administrator does not bother to automate. While a good one would configure a system that is capable of raising an alert the moment it detects an anomaly, the terrible one would prefer to read individual system events and system logs.

11. Wrong approach to rights: Employees come and go: they move across departments climbing and falling on the corporate ladder. Each move requires a change in user access privilege rights. Allowing wrong access to confidential and sensitive data is an IT department head’s worst nightmare. But, the terrible network administrator does not need to continually monitor user rights, thus inviting disaster into the network.

12. Bypass passwords: While correct password etiquette demands that your password is sufficiently long, uses a mix of characters, doesn’t include any personal information, and requires frequent changes, a terrible network administrator pays no attention to this subsequently inviting hackers in. How about using one of the five most-used passwords in the world?

13. Patchy patches: Network security is at the bottom of the priority list for terrible administrators – they don’t upgrade security software, don’t scan for viruses and other malware on a regular basis, don’t believe users when they claim to have critical problems, don’t update their operating systems, don’t apply regular patches from the software manufacturer – in short, they don’t protect their network at all.

14. Hacking is unethical: Of course it is, but when you’re a network administrator, you should think like a hacker in order to be able to catch one or thwart his/her attempts. It takes a crook to catch a crook becomes the motto here. Efficient administrators try to stay one step ahead of intruders by knowing how to hack into networks themselves. The incompetent administrator does not bother about knowing when an attack is coming though.

15. Prevention is not better than the cure: As a good administrator you have to watch for the signs that tell you an intrusion is being planned. Perform port scans and check if your system files have been altered. Stay on the alert for internal attacks from disgruntled employees who have access to information. Lock down your network room. However preventive maintenance is none of a terrible network administrator’s concerns.

16. Pay no attention to your users: Since the most common means of entry for malware is through private user email attachments and downloads from dicey websites, it makes sense to monitor users’ email and internet usage. The terrible network administrator takes the “everybody is entitled to their privacy and perversions” route – he follows a lax policy when it comes to a question of network security.

17. Successors don’t matter: The bad system administrators have no sympathy for those who may replace them some day; the good ones ensure that the system is repeatable. A good system administrator will work hard to develop a standard for deploying an operating system or software applications in the same way across all the systems on the network. Anyone can manually load each system one by one, but it takes a skilled individual to design a system to streamline the process.

18. Predecessors do: Terrible network administrators will automatically assume that his predecessor was an excellent administrator, and not bother to find out if programs are up to date, if there are airtight security and password policies in place, if there are detailed records of past attacks and intrusions, and if employee access rights are controlled and monitored on a regular basis.

19. Time and tide wait for the terrible admin: That’s because they are not bothered with completing tasks in the minimum time required to do them. Even the simplest of tasks like resetting passwords take ages, simply because the administrator does not want to do his job.

20. Integrity issues: Ever consider selling your network secrets and passwords on eBay?. A network administrator with no sense of integrity has.

21. Be here, there, everywhere: While a good administrator will try to remain invisible, secure in the knowledge that he knows the network well enough to make even the most difficult tasks appear simple, the terrible network administrator will appear to be in more than one place at the same time, though he will not get anything worthwhile done. A well-administered network is usually attributed to an admin who stays behind the scenes but knows exactly what's going on.

22. Cleanliness is not next to godliness: The terrible admin has his work easy – there’s no need to continually check and clean hardware, even if he knows that the procedures tend to extend the lives of the devices.

23. Fake facts for a while: While a good network administrator is generally adept at handling two or more operating systems and mail server programs and is familiar with the most common acronyms in the business, the terrible ones just fake their way through.

24. Jump to conclusions: When problems crop up in the network, the bad administrators do not consider the entire picture; they’re more focused on reaching hasty decisions. They don’t take the time to make notes on what has changed and what events have taken place prior to the occurrence of the problem.

25. Odds and ends will do: Why use products that are proven to work when the stuff on sale MIGHT be as good? Incompetent network administrators choose this policy: when the pencil breaks, the network will fall.

How to Be a Manager that Your Employees Respect: 73 Surefire Tips

You've got that look on your face, the look that screams charisma and style. You've got that air about you, the air that exudes confidence and capability. You've got the qualities that rake in the big bucks for your organization and your employees jump to attention when you appear making sure to work their butts off when you're around. You're probably not far off from thinking that you're the best manager in town.

But do your employees do their best when you're not around? Do they prefer to work for you rather than any other manager in the company? Do they make a beeline to get in on your team? Do they go that extra mile to do that task more efficiently without being asked? Do they have nice things to say about you, even when you're not within earshot? In short, do they respect you, both as a person and as their superior?

If you answered yes to most of the questions above, you're on the road to becoming a manager who's earned the esteem and admiration of all, or most of your employees. For those of you who did not, cast your worries aside; we've compiled a list of tips that, if followed, are guaranteed to win you the loyalty and respect of your subordinates.

Interactions - the lifeblood of any organization…

1. What goes around comes around: Treat your employees, peers and superiors with respect, from the lowest janitor to the CEO of the company.

2. Basic humaneness pays: Acknowledge that your employees are human beings first, and your employees only next; accord them their due dignity.

3. Know your employees: Using first names thaws a formal atmosphere and makes for a more harmonious work environment. Throw in a casual question about a child or a problem you know they recently went through.

4. Bring out their hidden potential: Tap your employees hidden talents and bring them to the front.

5. One man's meat is another's poison: What serves as motivation for one may not mean as much to another, use your discretion in getting the best out of your employees.

6. Equality among all: It's not wise to play favorites and show bias when dealing with your employees.

7. Don't be a Jack-of-all-trades: Delegate work. Your employees will welcome the chance to show what they are capable of.

8. Match the right job to the right person: Some people are more suited to creative tasks while others are better at the repetitive ones. As a manager, you should be able to sense when tasks and personnel are mismatched and set things right quickly.

9. Delineate responsibility: Establish boundaries of control for each employee so that blame or praise can be assigned accordingly.

10. Trust your employees: Do not monitor every aspect and moment of their working day. The realization that you trust them to do their jobs effectively without supervision will drive them to justify that faith.

11. Pay them well: Salaries should be on par or higher than industry standards. Adequate monetary compensation is one of the best motivators for hard work.

12. Reward exceptional performances: Acknowledge and appreciate every extra effort that your employees take. While money as an incentive is always welcome, I'm sure they'll also welcome professional advancement opportunities, a day or a few hours off, or just a pat on the back.

13. Praise in public, punish in private: Taking an employee to task in front of his/her colleagues, even though he/she may have erred, has the worst kind of demoralizing effect. On the other hand, complimenting them on a job well done in the presence of others serves to motivate them to perform better.

14. Loudness does not help: Do not rake employees over the coals for mistakes that happen inadvertently. Instead, help them understand the error so they don't repeat it. A loud voice and swear words will only make them tune out to the message you are trying to convey.

15. Personalization is the key: Each of us is different; while some employees may appreciate you following an informal approach in all your interactions, others may not take kindly to the familiarity.

16. Lend a ear: Empathize with their personal problems without getting too involved in their personal lives.

17. Make them feel they count: Every employee likes to know that he/she is making a positive contribution to the company and is not just a decorative piece that is dispensable. The fact that they make a difference will drive them to be more productive.

18. Family matters: Allow your employees time for their families and personal issues when the situation warrants it. Support them in times of emotional upheavals when you know they may not be able to turn in their best work.

19. Constructive criticism works: If you feel that an employee has the potential to do much better at his/her job, take them aside and tell them how you feel. Sometimes, the belief that a superior has in you pushes you to achieve more.

20. Be a mentor: Anyone can be a superior, but it takes a special person to be a mentor to people working under him/her. Encourage your employees' positive aspects and help them eliminate their weaker traits.

21. Don't hold too tight: Allow your employees to pursue both professional and personal opportunities to advance. Holding them back only shows your pettiness. Help them further their education or broaden their horizons in work-related skills. This builds both respect and intense loyalty.

22. Flattery will get you nowhere: Do not flatter your employees to get them to do their job. A good manager (or employee) knows the difference between praise and flattery. The former is welcome, the latter, a definite no.

23. Ask and you will receive: Get suggestions and opinions from your employees. Ask them for better ways to go about work and newer methods to improve productivity. Besides improving their respect for you, it will make them feel part of the whole process.

24. Mistakes happen: Allow your employees room to make mistakes and you'll find that they do a perfect job. Running a tight ship will only make them nervous and lead to a lot of errors.

25. Give credit where it's due: Do not ride piggyback on your employees as you take the path to success. If a brilliant concept was the brainchild of your employee, accord him due credit, especially in front of your superiors.

26. Group dynamics: Learn to manage your team well. Know which people work well together, who does which tasks the best, and who is capable of what, in order the get the best results from team work.

27. Feedback matters: Provide correct feedback. If the feedback is it's negative, don't let it demoralize your employees; if it's positive, don't let it go to their heads.

28. Share misfortune: Show your solidarity with your employees when they are forced to take a pay cut when the organization faces financial difficulties. It's difficult, but offering to slash your salary will win you oodles of respect.

29. It's a diverse world: Respect the cultural and social differences of your employees. Their religion and rituals mean a lot to them; belittling them will not win you any brownie points.

30. Show interest: Indifference is as bad, if not worse, than too much interference. Take the right amount of interest in what your employees do.

31. Allow them to complain: Hear them out before deciding if their complaint is genuinely valid.

32. Different people, different styles: Each employee has his/her working style; recognize this and allow them that freedom as long as it does not affect the job being done.

33. No technology needed: Break bad news to your employees in person. If you have to let them go or ask them to take a pay cut, do not resort to hiding behind an email.

34. Equal work, equal pay: Distribute work evenly so that no one person feels he/she is unfairly burdened.

35. Judge not: Don't play favorites in employee quarrels and misunderstandings; you're not Solomon the Wise or the Supreme Court judge deciding who's wrong and who's right. If it's work-related, try to smooth things over without taking sides; otherwise, stay out of it.

36. No tattletales wanted: Don't encourage employees who carry tales about their peers.

37. Time flies: Don't set unreasonable deadlines knowing fully well that your employees will have to give up every second of their free time to get the task done on schedule.

38. Disseminate information: Keep your employees within the loop. Inform them of all decisions that will affect and be affected by their work. Don't treat them as mindless machines that are used only to get the job done.

39. Keep your distance: Don't become too friendly with certain employees even though you feel you're on the same wavelength. Others may suspect favoritism, even when there is none.

40. No "I" only "We": Don't flaunt your authority; "You have to do it because I say so" is not the way to go when you want your employees' respect; you may get the job done but lose your employee's esteem in the process.

Work out work and vacation issues…

41. Do not overburden them with work: Just because you know your employees are not in a position to refuse your demands, do not dump work on them. You stand to anger them and run the risk of a poorly performed job.

42. Vacations are personal: When your employees have time off, do not demand to know where they're going or who they're taking along. Do not invade their personal space.

43. Keep the office at the office: Avoid calling employees at home or during vacations unless there is an emergency of the direst nature. Seek prior permission to call in such cases.

44. Avoid last-minute tasks: No one likes to start a task at the end of the day, especially when you have other plans for the evening. Do not throw work at your employees just as they are about to call it a day.

If you are male…

45. No adult humor: Do not crack vulgar and offensive jokes at the expense of female employees or the wives/girlfriends of male employees.

46. Accord respect: Treat your female employees well; do not look down on them or show chauvinistic tendencies.

47. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: Remember that male and female physiques are different. Cut your female employees some slack when they have special needs during pregnancy, childbirth, maternity and PMS.

If you are female…

48. No false pretenses: Do not take perverse pleasure in putting down male employees just because you feel the need to assert yourself.

49. Clothes maketh the (wo)man: Dress appropriately. Clothes that reveal more than they cover will only make you the butt (no pun intended) of office jokes.

There's always room for personal improvement…

50. Be the best: Employees automatically respect managers who are good at their jobs and who know what they are talking about. It's very difficult to listen to an employer that doesn't make very much sense.

51. Manage your time: It pays to be organized. Plan your day and chart out your activities so that you don't have to rush around in front of your employees.

52. Ethics matter: Be ethical in all your dealings, from the most trivial to the most important. Your employees will not only hold you in high regard, they will also follow the example you set.

53. Be proactive, not reactive: Take control of events and happenings. Don't wait for things to happen before you decide your course of action.

54. Admit your mistakes: It's hard to swallow pride and admit that you're wrong, especially to your subordinates. Doing so will not only make them admire you more, but also make it easier for them to admit their own mistakes.

55. Rudeness does not pay: Learn the art of being authoritative without appearing to be rude.

56. Neither does arrogance: Do not swagger around in the mistaken knowledge that just because you are their superior, you have the right to do what you want.

57. Waste not, want not: Do not waste your time in trivial pursuits, even if you do not have important work to do. Idle chatter on the phone, browsing the Internet for fun, or chatting on the Web are better left out of the office, especially if you don't want your employees doing the same thing.

58. Humor works: A sense of humor, especially one directed at yourself, will go a long way in getting your employees to respect and like you as a person.

59. Focus, focus, focus: Stay focused on targets, both personal and the organization's. It's easier to shepherd your flock when you have a clear idea of where you're leading them.

60. Avoid the office grapevine: Do not support or join in gossip about your employees. The subject of the rumor (or truth) will certainly lose his/her last smidgen of respect for you.

61. Be one of the gang: Do not consider it below your dignity to do tasks that you normally ask your employees to do. Sharing their responsibility at times will help them relate to you on a more personal level.

62. Take love out of the air: Do not get romantically involved with or flirt with your employees.

63. Watch what you do: Inappropriate behavior and sexual harassment could end up costing you more than just the respect of your subordinates.

64. Don't suck up: Kissing up to your superior or boss will not put you in the good books of your employees. The ones that do approve your behavior will try to work their flattery on you to get on your good side.

65. Practice what you preach: Lead by example: come in early if you expect your employees to do so, stay late, work overtime, forgo vacations – anything you ask them to do, be willing to do it yourself.

66. Look and learn: Is there another manager that your team admires? Watch his actions – there are valuable lessons he can teach you.

67. Stand firm on your beliefs: Do not hesitate to stand up for what you believe is right, and do not cave in under pressure.

68. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again: Do not let failure get you down. Use your tribulations as stepping stones to success.

69. Stay firm on terra firma: Do not let success go to your head. Remember, life is full of ups and downs. Celebrate jobs well done and projects completed on time, but in an understated manner.

70. Be approachable: Let your employees know they can come to you with any issue and that you will give them both your time and a fair hearing.

71. Forgive and forget: Do not bear personal grudges against employees. It comes in the way of doing your job effectively.

72. Wisdom pays: Take decisions that are advantageous to both the organization and your employees; favoring one over the other will either make you less efficient or less popular.

73. Be there: You may not need to be around to get things done in the office, but make sure you are in everyday, monitoring progress and mapping out plans. An absent manager who comes in only to take credit for the work of his/her team is placed right at the bottom of the respect scale.

Being a manager, especially one that your employees respect and look up to, is certainly no piece of cake. Respect is one quality that is not innate, it has to be earned. Fame and fortune may come overnight, but not respect – you have to work at the qualities that make your subordinates proud to be a part of your unit, little by little, day by day, week after week.

Top 10 Largest Databases in the World

We all collected things as children. Rocks, baseball cards, Barbies, perhaps even bugs -- we all tried to gather up as much stuff as possible to compile the biggest most interesting collection possible.  Some of you may have even been able to amass a collection of items numbering into the hundreds (or thousands).

As the story always goes, we got older, our collections got smaller, and eventually our interests died out...until now.

There are currently organizations around the world in the business of amassing collections of things, and their collections number into and above the trillions.  In many cases these collections, or databases, consist of items we use every day.

In this list, we cover the top 10 largest databases in the world:

10. Library of Congress

Not even the digital age can prevent the world's largest library from ending up on this list.  The Library of Congress (LC) boasts more than 130 million items ranging from cook books to colonial newspapers to U.S. government proceedings. It is estimated that the text portion of the Library of Congress would comprise 20 terabytes of data. The LC expands at a rate of 10,000 items per day and takes up close to 530 miles of shelf space -- talk about a lengthy search for a book.

If you're researching a topic and cannot find the right information on the internet, the Library of Congress should be your destination of choice.  For users researching U.S. history, around 5 million pieces from the LC's collection can be found online at American Memory.

Unfortunately for us, the Library of Congress has no plans of digitizing the entirety of its contents and limits the people who can check out materials to Supreme Court Justices, members of Congress, their respective staff, and a select few other government officials; however, anyone with a valid Reader Identification Card (the LC's library card) can access the collection.

By the Numbers

• 130 million items (books, photographs, maps, etc)
• 29 million books
• 10,000 new items added each day
• 530 miles of shelves
• 5 million digital documents
• 20 terabytes of text data

9. Central Intelligence Agency

The Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) is in the business of collecting and distributing information on people, places and things, so it should come as no surprise that they end up on this list.  Although little is known about the overall size of the CIA's database, it is certain that the agency has amassed a great deal of information on both the public and private sectors via field work and digital intrusions.

Portions of the CIA database available to the public include the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) Electronic Reading Room, The World Fact Book, and various other intelligence related publications.  The FOIA library includes hundreds of thousands of official (and occasionally ultra-sensitive) U.S. government documents made available to the public electronically. The library grows at a rate of 100 articles per month and contains topics ranging from nuclear development in Pakistan to the type of beer available during the Korean War. The World Fact Book boasts general information on every country and territory in the world including maps, population numbers, military capabilities and more.

By the Numbers

• 100 FOIA items added each month
• Comprehensive statistics on more than 250 countries and entities
• Unknown number of classified information

8. Amazon

Amazon, the world's biggest retail store, maintains extensive records on its 59 million active customers including general personal information (phone number address, etc), receipts, wishlists, and virtually any sort of data the website can extract from its users while they are logged on.  Amazon also keeps more than 250,000 full text books available online and allows users to comment and interact on virtually every page of the website, making Amazon one of the world's largest online communities.

This data coupled with millions of items in inventory Amazon sells each year -- and the millions of items in inventory Amazon associates sell -- makes for one very large database. Amazon's two largest databases combine for more than 42 terabytes of data, and that's only the beginning of things.  If Amazon published the total number of databases they maintain and volume of data each database contained, the amount of data we know Amazon houses would increase substantially.

But still, you say 42 terabytes, that doesn't sound like so much. In relative terms, 42 terabytes of data would convert to 37 trillion forum posts.

By the Numbers

• 59 million active customers
• More than 42 terabytes of data

7. YouTube

After less than two years of operation YouTube has amassed the largest video library (and subsequently one of the largest databases) in the world.  YouTube currently boasts a user base that watches more than 100 million clips per day accounting for more than 60% of all videos watched online.

In August of 2006, the Wall Street Journal projected YouTube's database to the sound of 45 terabytes of videos. While that figure doesn't sound terribly high relative to the amount of data available on the internet, YouTube has been experiencing a period of substantial growth (more than 65,000 new videos per day) since that figures publication, meaning that YouTube's database size has potentially more than doubled in the last 5 months.

Estimating the size of YouTube's database is particularly difficult due to the varying sizes and lengths of each video.  However if one were truly ambitious (and a bit forgiving) we could project that the YouTube database will expect to grow as much as 20 terabytes of data in the next month.

Given: 65,000 videos per day X 30 days per month = 1,950,000 videos per month; 1 terabyte = 1,048,576 megabytes. If we assume that each video has a size of 1MB, YouTube would expect to grow 1.86 terabytes next month.  Similarly, if we assume that each video has a size of 10MB, YouTube would expect to grow 18.6 terabytes next month.

By the Numbers

• 100 million videos watched per day
• 65,000 videos added each day
• 60% of all videos watched online
• At least 45 terabytes of videos

6. ChoicePoint

Imagine having to search through a phone book containing a billion pages for a phone number. When the employees at ChoicePoint want to know something about you, they have to do just that. If printed out, the ChoicePoint database would extend to the moon and back 77 times.

ChoicePoint is in the business of acquiring information about the American population -- addresses and phone numbers, driving records, criminal histories, etc., ChoicePoint has it all. For the most part, the data found in ChoicePoint's database is sold to the highest bidders, including the American government.

But how much does ChoicePoint really know? In 2002 ChoicePoint was able to help authorities solve a serial rapist case in Philadelphia and Fort Collins after producing a list of 6 potential suspects by data mining their DNA and personal records databases. In 2001 ChoicePoint was able to identify the remains of World Trade Center victims by matching DNA found in bone fragments to the information provided by victim's family members in conjunction to data found in their databases.

By the Numbers

• 250 terabytes of personal data
• Information on 250 million people

5. Sprint

Sprint is one of the world's largest telecommunication companies as it offers mobile services to more than 53 million subscribers, and prior to being sold in May of 2006, offered local and long distance land line packages.

Large telecommunication companies like Sprint are notorious for having immense databases to keep track of all of the calls taking place on their network.  Sprint's database processes more than 365 million call detail records and operational measurements per day. The Sprint database is spread across 2.85 trillion database rows making it the database with the largest number of rows (data insertions if you will) in the world. At its peak, the database is subjected to more than 70,000 call detail record insertions per second.

By the Numbers

• 2.85 trillion database rows.
• 365 million call detail records processed per day
• At peak, 70,000 call detail record insertions per second

4. Google

Although there is not much known about the true size of Google's database (Google keeps their information locked away in a vault that would put Fort Knox to shame), there is much known about the amount of and types of information Google collects.

On average, Google is subjected to 91 million searches per day, which accounts for close to 50% of all internet search activity.  Google stores each and every search a user makes into its databases.  After a years worth of searches, this figure amounts to more than 33 trillion database entries.  Depending on the type of architecture of Google's databases, this figure could comprise hundreds of terabytes of information.

Google is also in the business of collecting information on its users.  Google combines the queries users search for with information provided by the Google cookies stored on a user's computer to create virtual profiles.

To top it off, Google is currently experiencing record expansion rates by assimilating into various realms of the internet including digital media (Google Video, YouTube), advertising (Google Ads), email (GMail), and more.  Essentially, the more Google expands, the more information their databases will be subjected to.

In terms of internet databases, Google is king.

By the Numbers

• 91 million searches per day
• accounts for 50% of all internet searches
• Virtual profiles of countless number of users

3. AT&T

Similar to Sprint, the United States' oldest telecommunications company AT&T maintains one of the world's largest databases.  Architecturally speaking, the largest AT&T database is the cream of the crop as it boasts titles including the largest volume of data in one unique database (312 terabytes) and the second largest number of rows in a unique database (1.9 trillion), which comprises AT&T's extensive calling records.

The 1.9 trillion calling records include data on the number called, the time and duration of the call and various other billing categories. AT&T is so meticulous with their records that they've maintained calling data from decades ago -- long before the technology to store hundreds of terabytes of data ever became available.  Chances are, if you're reading this have made a call via AT&T, the company still has all of your call's information.

By the Numbers

• 323 terabytes of information
• 1.9 trillion phone call records

2. National Energy Research Scientific Computing Center

The second largest database in the world belongs to the National Energy Research Scientific Computing Center (NERSC) in Oakland, California.  NERSC is owned and operated by the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory and the U.S. Department of Energy.  The database is privy to a host of information including atomic enegry research, high energy physics experiements, simulations of the early universe and more. Perhaps our best bet at traveling back in time is to fire up NERSC's supercomputers and observe the big bang.

The NERSC database encompasses 2.8 petabytes of information and is operated by more than 2,000 computational scientists. To put the size of NERSC into perspective, the total amount of spoken words in the history of humanity is estimated to be at 5 exabytes; in relative terms, the NERSC database is equivalent to 0.055% of the size of that figure.

Although that may not seem a lot at first glance, when you factor in that 6 billion humans around the globe speak more than 2,000 words a day, the sheer magnitude of that number becomes apparent.

By the Numbers

• 2.8 petabytes of data
• Operated by 2,000 computational scientists

1. World Data Centre for Climate

If you had a 35 million euro super computer lying around what would you use it for? The stock market? Building your own internet? Try extensive climate research -- if there's a machine out there that has the answer for global warming, this one might be it. Operated by the Max Planck Institute for Meteorology and German Climate Computing Centre, The World Data Centre for Climate (WDCC) is the largest database in the world.

The WDCC boasts 220 terabytes of data readily accessible on the web including information on climate research and anticipated climatic trends, as well as 110 terabytes (or 24,500 DVD's) worth of climate simulation data. To top it off, six petabytes worth of additional information are stored on magnetic tapes for easy access. How much data is six petabyte you ask?  Try 3 times the amount of ALL the U.S. academic research libraries contents combined.

By the Numbers

• 220 terabytes of web data
• 6 petabytes of additional data

* Additional Databases

The following databases were unique (and massive) in their own right, and just fell short of the cut on our top 10 list.

Nielsen Media Research / Nielsen Net Ratings

Best known for its television audience size and composition rating abilities, the U.S. firm Nielsen Media Research is in the business of measuring mass-media audiences including television, radio, print media, and the internet.  The database required to process such statistics as Google's daily internet searches is nothing short of massive.

Myspace

It would seem appropriate that the world's largest social networking site, Myspace, has a rather large database to keep up with all of its user's content.

United States Customs

The U.S. Customs database is unique in that it requires information on hundreds of thousands of people and objects entering and leaving the United States borders instantaneously.  For this to be possible, the database was special programmed to process queries near instantaneously.

HPSS

There are various databases around the world using technology similar to that found in our countdown's second largest database NERSC.  The technology is known as High Performance Storage System or HPSS.  Several other massive HPSS databases include Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory, Sandia National Laboratories, Los Alamos National Laboratory, Commissariat a l'Energie Atomique Direction des Applications Militaires, and more.

Top 10 Hilarious Viruses, Trojans and Worms

Virus, Trojan, Worm – the very words conjure up crossbones and skulls, the symbol of danger. These malicious programs are the scourge of the Internet, the proof that every innovative and useful technology has an equivalent downside – one that has the most adverse consequences at times. They steal your passwords, corrupt your files memory and OS, open backdoors to your systems, install quirky programs that replicate and spread, and generally cause your computer to behave abnormally.

But there was a time not so long ago when viruses were written just for the fun of it – not to create any real harm, but rather to see if they worked. The creators were usually extremely clever young programmers who spent most of their time in front of their computers. Though the files spread rapidly from one system to another, all they did was produce some funny faces or a cascade of raindrops on your screen. But then, these form just a drop in the ocean of malware that roams through the Internet.

While the consequences of these deadly programs are certainly no laughing matter, there are a few of them that bring an inadvertent smile to your face by virtue of their names, by the graphics they display on execution, or just by the sheer newsworthiness of their exploits. Here are the 10 viruses, Trojans, and worms that caused a little anxiety, some humorous moments, and a lot of confusion.

Did it tickle your funny bone or go straight to your heart? Mum's the word!

1. The "Very Funny" or "I Love You" Virus: This one hit the Internet in the year 2000 and corrupted image and music files on user systems. Identified initially by the words "I love you" or "Joke: Very Funny" in the subject line of an email, the virus was later passed around as newer, more malicious versions that overwrote important files needed to boot the computer. These masqueraded as Mother's Day messages or Lithuanian flirting techniques – some email came with the tag "Let's meet for a cup of coffee," in Lithuanian, of course. Bolder versions took advantage of the scare created by their predecessors, and pretended to be representatives from anti-virus software providers. They asked users to execute the attachment to eradicate all viruses from their computers!

Rats! And I used to love Saturdays!

2. The HPS Virus: The first of its kind written for the Windows 98 OS, this virus took its name from a dreaded disease transmitted by rats. Hantavirus Pulmonary Syndrome (HPS) is known to cause acute respiratory distress in the human body, but its digital namesake was nowhere near as harmful. If present on your system, the HPS virus went into action on Saturdays and flipped over uncompressed bitmaps horizontally. In plain English, it produced a mirror image of your screen. An interesting snippet about this virus: HPS hit the Web in early 1998,even before the Windows 98 operating system was available for commercial use.

Is this why you say NO to drugs?

3. The Stoned or Marijuana Virus: A virus belonging to the stone age of the computer era, this one infected the early DOS systems through floppy disks. First seen in New Zealand in 1988, the original version did not cause any real damage; it simply displayed the message, "Your computer is stoned. Legalize Marijuana" on your screen. However the 90 odd variants of the stoned virus (with names as random as Donald Duck, Hawaii, Rostov, Smithsonian, StonedMutation and more) did do considerable damage to the Master Boot Record and File Allocation Table in your hard disk.

Where were the privacy laws when you needed them?

4. The PolyPoster Virus: Remember how your talking parrot could embarrass you no end if you had any secrets to hide? Well, this virus took on where Polly left off. Known as a macro virus, the PolyPoster not only infected your MS Word files, it posted them to public Usenet newsgroups without your knowledge, under the tempting title "Important Monica Lewinsky Info." The virus strayed into the computers of all those who read these documents, which explains the Lewinsky connection – the virus writer obviously hoped to capitalize on the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal that dominated headlines in 1998. Popular discussion groups that played host to your most confidential and personal documents (thanks to the PolyPoster virus) were alt.sex.stories, alt.hacker, alt.binaries.pictures.erotica, alt.fan.hanson, alt.windows95 and alt.skinheads.   

Caricature?  Cartoon? No, Clinton.

5. The Caric-A Worm: Former US president Bill Clinton provided a lot of fodder for the gossip mills during his tenor at the White House, and as late as 2002 as this famous worm proved. Also known as the Bill Clinton and the MyLife-B worm, this malicious program was activated after opening an email's attachment and displayed a cartoon of Clinton playing the saxophone equipped with a bra popping out of the sax's mouth. The writers of this worm tried to be clever by adding a line to the end of the email, supposedly from anti-virus vendor McAfee, which claimed the email contained no viruses.

Hidden agenda behind the hilarity.

6. The Wurmark Worm:Appearing on the Internet in 2005, the Wurmark-F worm was disguised as a picture of a funny looking old man. Once inside your computer, the worm installed a Trojan, which in turn allowed remote hackers to take control of your infected system. Your computer was then at their beck and call and used to propagate the worm further along the Web. The worm also deleted files randomly from your system, and mailed itself to all your Outlook contacts, using your mail id.

The brain behind it all.

7. The Brain Virus: The brainchild of two Pakistani brothers in 1986, this virus was not meant to be a virus at all. The siblings had written it with the intent to protect their medical software from being pirated. It ended up being the first ever virus to infect the PC. Known by various names, including Lahore, Pakistani, Pakistani Brain, Brain-A, UIUC, Ashar, and Pakistani flu, this pretty-large virus affected the boot sector, changed the disk label to (c)Brain, and displayed the text:

Welcome to the Dungeon (c) 1986 Brain & Amjads (pvt) Ltd VIRUS_SHOE RECORD V9.0 Dedicated to the dynamic memories of millions of viruses who are no longer with us today - Thanks GOODNESS!! BEWARE OF THE er..VIRUS : this program is catching program follows after these messages....$#@%$@!!

in affected boot sectors. It also ate up 7 KB of storage space and slowed down the floppy drive. Perhaps the duo were telling the truth when they said they meant no harm, because they gave out their names, address, and phone numbers in another similar message, asking those affected to contact them for a vaccine. Following a spate of irate calls from the United States and other western countries, they had to resort to a change in number!

How safe is your phone?

8. The Skulls Trojan horse: The rapid advances in the field of mobile technology meant that the malware guys were not far behind. The year 2004 saw this Trojan horse unleashed on Nokia smartphones that ran the Symbian operating system. Users infected with Skulls A found their screen icons replaced with ominous skulls and crossbones, and their handsets being reduced to mere telephones. They could only make and receive calls, other smart functions were disabled. Skulls or Skulls A spawned a series of alphabetical versions, like B, C and L each affecting the phones in a different manner. Version B rendered the phone almost useless just like A, but did not display skulls; C tried to disable the F-Secure anti-virus software; L was probably the most dangerous version – it pretended to be the F-Secure mobile anti-virus solution. All versions of the Trojan snuck the Cabir worm into the phones. This proof-of-concept malware for mobile phones spread through Bluetooth connections and used up the handset's battery power by constantly searching for other devices with open Bluetooth connections to infect.

Bet you didn't know - Mosquito bites cause more than Malaria.

9. The Mosquito Trojan horse: The Symbian OS was the target of another bug in 2004 – this time, the Mosquito Trojan. In another instance of an anti-piracy measure, the software infected phones when they downloaded illegal copies of Mosquito, a game designed for mobile smartphones. Once resident on the handsets, the Trojan sent out text messages at exorbitant costs to premium numbers in the UK, Germany, the Netherlands, and Switzerland, without the knowledge of its users. Vaccinating this one was easy – all those infected had to do was uninstall the game, which I'm sure they would have done once they saw their sky-high phone bills.

Are open Windows the cue for hackers entry?

10. The Cuebot-K Worm: Microsoft and controversy seem to go hand in hand. The software giant came in for some harsh criticism for its anti-piracy software, Windows Genuine Advantage (WGA). Users not only claimed that it was a form of spyware, they also alleged that it opened up their systems to malware via the Internet. The company issued an update to appease irate users, but to add to Microsoft's troubles, virus writers took advantage of this, and came up with the Cuebot-K worm. This 2006 program spread through the Web pretending to be the said update, and landed up in mailboxes supposedly from known AOL contacts. It launched itself when the system booted, and horror of horrors, displayed a message that removal or stoppage of the service would result in system instability. Hiding behind the "Windows Genuine Advantage Validation Notification" name, the worm opens up a backdoor to allow in hackers who then take control of user systems.

In this day and age, malware is no longer harmless. Hackers are at it with a vengeance - they want money more than fame. With more at stake, it is imperative that you protect your computer from the huge volume of malicious software that is unleashed on the Internet every day. Installing the best anti-virus program and keeping up to date with your security patches are not going be enough though – you have to be savvy enough to dodge the bugs that do get past your security software. As this list would have taught you, no attachments are perfectly safe and links embedded in emails are always risky propositions. Keep your wits about you, and use them when it really matters to keep your system free from infection.   

Top 10 Big Brother Companies: Ranking the Worst Consumer Privacy Infringers

How much would you sell your private data to a company for?  Would you take $100 to let someone see every site you have visited over the past year, how about $1,000? Today, many major companies spend millions collecting a variety data on individuals such as; what charities you donate to, your political beliefs, your shopping habits, your educational data and your contact information.

Unfortunately, you never get to decide how much your privacy is worth to you, because these companies aren't asking your permission.

In this article we highlight ten of the worst corporate offenders when it comes to invading privacy.

While we aren't so naive as to think that this sort of exposure is enough on its own to cause any real changes in corporate behavior, we hope that by helping to bring to light some of the personal privacy infringements that these companies are engaged in, more people will begin to select the companies they do business with on the basis of their privacy policy. If that starts to happen, real consumer-driven change is possible.

So without further adieu, here are the top ten big corporate privacy offenders:

10. Response Unlimited

In what is perhaps the boldest (and most brainless) information scam of all time, Response Unlimited, a large marketing firm, received authorization to sell a list of Terri Schiavo’s financial contributors to other companies as sales leads. The story broke on Response Unlimited's company wide privacy mining operation only after it was revealed that most of the donors were constantly getting loads of spam and telemarketing calls.

Response Unlimited’s shameless consumer data mining scheme earns them the number 10 spot on this countdown.

9. LexisNexis

Taking ninth place in our ranking is a company as notorious for its inability to secure the private information it has as it is for its privacy invasions. LexisNexis maintains the LexisNexis database, which includes millions of records which include mailing addresses of almost every person in the United States.  In July of 2005, the LexisNexis security system was compromised resulting in more than 300,000 records being stolen by computer hackers. This security breach ranks among the top personal data heists of all time. Luckily, the LexisNexis hackers were identified as a few teenage kids looking to have some fun, but it demonstrated how inept their security measures are at protecting one of the largest caches of private data in the world.

8. America Online

America Online's privacy intrusion efforts are so aggressive and offensive, that the only explanation seems to be that AOL thought its clientele was so naïve they would never catch on to the company's privacy invasions.  In August of 2006, America Online released web search data from more than 650,000 users without prior consent. A handful of users involved have since then filed a lawsuit against America Online citing that the released data contained information some users considered too private to ever make it beyond the comforts of their own home.

To attract new customers, America Online is currently using an anti-spyware software campaign.  What America Online fails to tell you is that packaged within portions of their software (including AIM and various online games) lies WildTangent, an application that reports personal information directly to various databases.  America Online went so far as fail to tell users WildTangent was being installed on their machines in the End User License Agreement, until mounting complaints finally forced their hand.

7. Amazon.com

It should come as no surprise that the world's biggest online store has a lot of private information pass through its servers on a daily basis.  Amazon.com happens to have receipts on more than 59 million active customers, which are used by the company to track the purchases that individual customers make.

To make matters worse, Amazon.com now has the capability to cross reference their database with public records to create enough marketing information to make any unscrupulous retailer squeal with delight.  Amazon.com is currently among the world leaders in distributing information about its users to advertisers, and if they continue this practice the recent advancements in data mining by Amazon threaten to make shopping online with any form of anonymity a thing of the past. To give you an idea of the severity of Amazon.com’s commitment to exploiting their costumers here is an excerpt from their privacy policy:

"As we continue to develop our business, we might sell or buy stores, subsidiaries, or business units. In such transactions, customer information generally is one of the transferred business assets."

Yes, you read that correctly, Amazon is in the business of selling private consumer data.  And for that move, they earn the #7 spot in our ranking.

6. Yahoo!

The world’s most popular website Yahoo! is also one of the world’s biggest data aggregators.  The plethora of services Yahoo! offers provides the ideal data collection scheme.  The beauty of the system is, Yahoo! doesn’t have to go through any extraordinary means to obtain your personal information; instead, users voluntarily give Yahoo! their information every time they use a Yahoo! product, perform a search, enter a Yahoo! promotion or sweepstakes, or purchase products through Yahoo!. Eventually, Yahoo! has acquired enough of your personal data to create for each user an individualized profile which they use to target advertisements that are most likely to appeal to you.

5. Microsoft

It will come as little surprise to many that Microsoft products are among the world’s elite when it comes to privacy invasion.  Microsoft is constantly developing new ways to aggregate customer data for the ostensible purpose of creating a "smoother ride" for the user. Practically speaking, however, many Microsoft products and features are designed simply to provide a convenient way for the program to report back to Microsoft databases what type of activities you regularly engage in on your computer.  In effect, the Windows operating system works like a two-way mirror: the customer has little idea that Microsoft is literally watching every move he makes.

Perhaps the most insidious method of privacy invasion Microsoft employs is the “Windows Live ID” (formerly Microsoft .NET Passport).  The Windows Live ID collects data from the majority of Microsoft networks including MSN, Hotmail, and Xbox Live, and stores them in a central database.  This data includes email addresses, generic personal information (name, age, etc), your favorites (books, video games, gadgets, etc), address books and contact lists (so your friends can be exploited too!), and much more. Microsoft then takes this data and generates ads targeted specifically to you.

4. Accenture

Accenture takes the forth sport on this list for their growing reputation in expanding digital dossiers and accepting a $10 billion dollar contract with the United States Department of Homeland Security to build a surveillance system that tracks visitors, to, from, and within the United States.  The system calls for extensive fingerprints and photographs of all visa wavier travelers and non-naturalized U.S. residents.  The system is also experimenting in futuristic technologies such as biometrics via iris scanning and facial recognition. So not only does Accenture know your credit history and previous court dates (even if only jury duty), they also know what you look like.

3. Acxiom

Dubbed as the premiere source of addresses and telephone numbers for telemarketers and mass mailers, Acxiom has a reputation of collecting data better than anyone else.  Acxiom boasts records on millions of Americans including drug test and criminal histories, education data, and the popular “Suspected Terrorist Watchlist” available at a premium price.  The company claims this data is to help employers weed out untruthful applicants and illegal employees, but often the information is used to create very targeted ads by advertisers.

2. Google

It seems the only thing growing faster than Google’s control of online searches is their database which they hope will eventually hold information on every internet user in the world. Google boasts databases big enough to permanently save the countless number of searches internet users make each and every day.  The information Google stores on its users is great enough to create a virtual identity equipped with information ranging from favorite flavors of ice cream to sexual fantasies.  And who can forget Google’s infamous eye in the sky, also known as Google maps.  How scary of a thought is this: a group of people monitoring servers in California know everything you did yesterday, your major plans for the rest of the week, and where you live. To top it off, Google offers services such as GMail and Web Accelator that can store even more information about your personal life. Unfortunately, however, that isn't the worst of Googles privacy offenses.

Google’s most prominent form of data assimilation lies in their cookies.  Where most websites set cookies to expire in a few days (or in rare cases a few months) Google configures their cookies to expire in 30 years.  Google claims this gestation period is to gather information to provide users with more accurate search results and protect Google from denial of service attacks and other cyber-crimes, but the simple truth is Google is gathering your information and has the storage space to create a very detailed picture of your online activity.

1. ChoicePoint

ChoicePoint, a marketing conglomerate, wins our coveted George Orwell award as the company most likely to be watching you right now; i.e., Big Brother. ChoicePoint maintains more than 17 billion records on 220 million people with topics ranging from social security numbers to DNA samples.  The majority of ChoicePoint’s information is sold to the highest bidder which more often than not happens to be a representative of the United States government, a leading American company, or a Nigerian fraud group. In addition to their willingness to sell private information to questionable sources, another factor that makes ChoicePoint the biggest privacy threat is the company's failure to provide a high level of data security.

In 2005 ChoicePoint announced that approximately 160,000 users in their database had various forms of sensitive information compromised. This breach in security resulted in more than 750 cases of full blown identify theft.

Conclusion

This list of the worst ten copmanies for privacy invasion and data mining is intended to highlight some of the worst actors among big business.  While this exposure on its own cannot make a big difference in causing companies to change their policy, by having citizens and internet users who are more aware and concerned about the threats posed by data mining, real change can actually occur.  So if this article leaves you with anything, I encourage you to become more educated about the privacy policies of the companies you do business with, and consider making consumer decisions on the basis of what you learn.

Lessons from the Lemonade Stand: 101 Common Sense Management Tips

Richard Branson does it effectively from a hammock in the Necker Island, Warren Buffet has been doing it since he was 11, and Bill Gates used it to single-handedly build an empire.

Arguably the most powerful and effective managers in the world, these men have one thing in common – they owe their management acumen and success not to fancy business degrees from the hallowed portals of Harvard and Yale, but to plain old, not-so-common, common sense.

In short, the tricks you learned as a child when you first embarked on an entrepreneurial endeavor with your own lemonade stand, still hold good in today’s cutthroat business world.

For those of you who’ve forgotten your first management lessons, here’s a back-to-basics primer to bring to the fore the principles and rules that really matter.

Self before service is the key here – Manage yourself first…

1. Open yourself to accept constructive criticism; learn and grow, not only from your mistakes, but from the mistakes of those around you too.

2. The buck stops with you – be prepared to accept responsibility for the actions of those working under you, especially when the issues concern your entire team.

3. Ignore the naysayers. Remember the story of the frogs in the well? If you don’t…Two frogs fell into a dry well and the other frogs took it for granted that they would die in there. When both attempted to jump their way out, the frogs outside discouraged from expending their energy on a hopeless task. Listening to them, one frog gave up his attempts. But the other made it out through his determination and single-mindedness. When asked how he made it in spite of the negative attitude of his fellow frogs, the survivor replied that he was deaf, and that he had thought the other frogs were cheering him on as he tried to get out of the well. Shows what a profound effect a positive outlook can have.

4. Understand that you are unique and different from other managers, and that is a good thing. Each industry demands different skills and varying aptitudes, which is why you should try to become more adept at your job rather than emulating another manager’s MO.

5. Ethics matter, both personally and in all your dealings. There are no caveats or strings attached to this rule, either you’re honest or you’re not.

6. Take risks – but make sure that they are calculated and not foolhardy. Toeing the safe and secure line never got anyone spectacular results.

7. Identify and grab opportunities before they slip through your net and jump back into the ocean of prospects. The Disney movie “14 Going on 30” has a remarkable dialog where one of the actors holds up a pumpkin seed and asks a class of teenagers what they see. When they state the obvious, he says, “You see a pumpkin seed, but I see possibilities.” The best managers see opportunity where others see nothing.

8. No issue is entirely about you, the whole team counts. Think more of “we” and less of “I”, and you'll have an environment conducive to success.

9. Manage and control your baser emotions like anger, hatred, envy and libido. Leave them behind when you come in to work each day. Remember that your behavior sets the tone of the office. The more professional you are, the more professional your team will be.   

10. There’s always room for improvement, no matter how good you, or others, think you are. Learning and the pursuit of knowledge are like exploring the deep trenches in the oceans – they reveal new nooks and crannies each time you make the dive.

11. Fine-tune your powers of persuasion and negotiation – these qualities work wonders when you’re trying to wheedle resources and perks for your department from the senior management or in crisis-management situations.

12. Learn to step in and take control when things begin to get out of hand; if the going is smooth, let things be, don’t wade in and muddy the waters.

13. Know when to press ahead with more steam and when to apply the brakes and pull back. Some situations demand an aggressive winner-takes-all attitude, while others would work better if you played the subtle cat-and-mouse game.

14. Know that stress is good, at a certain level and at certain times, to get your adrenaline flowing and to pump you up. But too much of stress too often can cause toxic reactions in your body.

15. Don’t attempt to dazzle your subordinates with bombastic buzzwords and unintelligible jargon. The simpler the better, to get your point across.

16. Watch your back – there are as many enemies around as there are friends. Positions of responsibility tend to come with the associated baggage of envy, hatred and prejudice.

Time and tide wait for no man – Manage each moment …

17. Get more out of 24 hours; plan more than you think you can do each day, if you manage to get all your tasks done, there’s no greater sense of achievement.

18. Well begun is half done, the early bird catches the worm – they may be the most repeated clichés, but they do have more than a modicum of truth in them.  Set your alarm clock earlier by a half hour, beat the rush hour traffic, get some work done before the rest of the office files in, or just use it to organize and plan the rest of your day.

19. Organize and manage your schedule, harness the right tools (your phones, PDAs, computers, etc.) to help you get your tasks done faster and better, and set your priorities.

20. Stick to schedules and routines, boring though they may be. Routines work wonders to improve productivity.

21. Do quality work; what matters is not the fact that you spend more than 12 hours at the office every day, but the results you have to show for those long work days. Measure your output, not the time expended, in doing tasks.

22. Focus your energies on the things that matter – a trivial office rivalry does not need your attention, the hiring of new staff does.

23. Get the most out of meetings, draw valuable insights from them and precent them from being a waste of time.

24. Identify your “time-stealers” and eliminate or reduce their effect on your daily routine.

25. Punctuality is next to godliness when you are a manager. Never keep people waiting, be on time for appointments and meetings.

26.  Respond to your correspondence within a reasonable time span – unanswered mails and unreturned phone calls can spiral out of control if not taken care of within 24 hours.

27. Do only what is necessary – wrap the gift with colorful crepe paper if the standards demand it, but make sure the bow on top is absolutely necessary before you spend time affixing it.

28. Know your limitations – both in your time and your abilities. Assume responsibility only for those things that you can do and learn to say a firm no to unreasonable demands on your time.

The human side of resources - Master the art of managing men…

29. Make a difference to your employees as their leader, stand out from the crowd, by virtue of your body language and actions.

30. When the occasion demands it, lead by example. Get down and dirty and do the most distasteful tasks; show your subordinates that no job is too demeaning.

31. Instruct rather than order – you’ll find your commands are better received and carried out.

32. Include your staff in your plans, let them know why they are doing the things they do, and how they are contributing to the growth of the organization.

33. Delegate, delegate, and delegate some more. Your job is to manage, not to do. Tom Sawyer did it most effectively when he managed to coax his friends, not only into whitewashing his fence, but also into pay